God reminded me today that I shouldn't try to numb the pain of this life, but I should genuinely learn to embrace it. Because if I don't know real pain, I can never know real joy. Real peace. When I encounter it, I would never truly be able to appreciate it.
It's like a hot meal. When you're served one every night, it becomes mundane. Boring. You search for new recipes to expand your selection and liven things up a bit from the same ole Mac-n-Cheese, pizza, meatloaf, chicken breast, and spaghetti dinners. But ask my husband what it's like to eat the same sandwich every evening for every dinner for a week. By the time the weekend comes, that man sure appreciates my meatloaf!
But seriously, guys, this deep, dark, death likened pain is not even closely related to eating sandwiches for a week. It's so much harder and so much worse.
Maybe you've had a death in the family. Guys- maybe your child passed away. Unimaginable, right? There are people in my life dealing with this tragic pain as we speak. A pain that won't ease up. A pain that seems too dark to ever come out of. In fact, this pain has become so much apart of them that they might not ever want to come out of it. They don't want to learn to move forward and live again- because that might in some sense be dishonoring their baby. Because how can the earth keep spinning without them? How can a mother or a father keep breathing and functioning without them.
Maybe you're in the midst of a divorce or separation. Maybe you're considering it? Maybe you're trying to heal from it. Maybe you've done something awful and you've betrayed your spouse in ways that even you can hardly imagine. If you're a Christian, any of these terrible situations will surely come with fear of shame, disappointment, condemnation, ridicule, or worse. I know some people who've been asked to leave their churches due to their sin. (Side note- that is NOT Jesus. That is religion and it's exactly what Jesus came to straighten out. It is NOT of God. Please don't let anyone convince you otherwise.)
Maybe you've just lost your job and don't know how you will provide for your family anymore. Maybe you're fighting an addiction that seems to always have the upper hand. Maybe you've won the battle of addiction, but it cost you every one and every thing that you've always known. Maybe you're struggling with an identity issue. You can't seem to figure out who you are, so you try on everyone else's personas like a fitting room- but nothing fits just right.
Maybe your pain isn't listed here. Maybe you keep it locked up tight in a secret corner of your heart, where nobody can see. If no one can see, then no one can judge you for it, right? Well conversely, if no one can see- no one can help you through it either.
Don't be afraid anymore. Don't keep your pain hidden. Don't give it control over you. Your pain is very real and it's very hard, but you're still breathing. You still have something to live for. Some purpose that maybe you know of, or maybe you've yet to discover. But you're still here. Acknowledge the pain. Don't try to be tough and pretend it isn't as bad as it is. Accept that it's there and that it sucks! Talk to someone about it. Get in the Word and see what God has to say about it. I encourage you to start journaling about it. Write about the struggles and the triumphs of your every day.
Remember that the night is darkest just before the dawn. There will be a resurrection from this death. Something beautiful and strong will rise up in you because of this pain. Some one somewhere will need to hear that you struggled too. They will need to know that you survived it. That you came out the other side better than before. Some days, you will need reminding of this journey as well (which is why I suggest the journaling). You will need to remember where you were and how far God has brought you. Don't give up. This pain is doing something. It's molding and changing and refining your story. Allow God to write the rest. The part where He walks in and brings resurrection. Press in to Him and trust the process.
Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. “Take away the stone,” he said.
“But, Lord,” said Martha, the sister of the dead man, “by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days.”
Then Jesus said, “Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?”
So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.”
When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.
Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”
-John 11:38-44
Guys, Jesus not only wants to heal us, but He is moved by our pain! He feels our hurts, he cries alongside with us! Lean into Him and allow His Spirit to give you comfort and peace like you've never known.
**Side note- Jesus knew that Lazarus was dying 2 days before he even decided to start traveling to him. He knew Lazarus as well as his sisters, Mary and Martha. They were really close friends of his. So why did he wait 2 whole days before traveling the 2 days to get there? What was up with the delay? Have you ever cried out to God and He didn't answer right away? Did you feel like He wasn't listening?
Well I assure you, God is always listening. He hears every word, thought, cry, you name it. He hears it all. Sometimes, because He loves us, He allows us to go through trials and suffering. Because without the death, there couldn't be a resurrection. A miracle. A God moment. A change in the tide. A new creation surfacing better than before.
Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?" - John 11:25
Well. Do you?
This is beautiful and real. Thank you Sarah. There are all kinds of pain that people try to ignore because of one reason or another. The best way to deal with it is to take it to the cross, knowing that is where real love, compassion, and understanding are.
ReplyDelete