But my reality is very much different than what I think people imagine. While 5 daughters isn't ideal for most people, it is for us. In fact, the day before I found out I was pregnant with my oldest, I didn't want kids at all. I was selfish and had big dreams that didn't involve tripping over anyone's Barbie dolls. Then the next day and several tests later, God changed my plans. Luciana opened my eyes to a world that I would've otherwise never given a chance. I never considered an abortion. I never considered giving her up for adoption. I just accepted it and kept moving forward, as I have continued to do with every twist God throws my way. 
Did I want to have 5 girls? Heck no! Does that mean I would go back in time and change the gender of one of them if I could? Would I go back in time and give a couple of them back? Never. These girls were made with the most incredible stuff. God filled them with gifts that I admire and cherish. Every snuggle, hug, kiss, song, dance, performance, smile, laugh, and cry makes this life a dream that I would've missed out on if God didn't take over. With every positive pregnancy test, my heart made room to love another being with everything I have. And I will be totally honest with you, I would have 6 more if I could. My girls are respectful, polite, kind, serving, loving, generous, gentle, hilarious, sweet, and all have the biggest hearts that you will ever experience. So, why would having these incredible little people be a bad thing? I get it. I totally do. I sat at an awards banquet the other night with many other young girls, boys, and their families. I listened to the horrid way they spoke to their parents. I heard them threaten their moms if they didn't get what they wanted, telling them to "shut up", and directly disobey whatever direction their parents had for them. (Mind you, these are not the 'bad kids' at school. This was a Future Business Leaders of America awards banquet. These were the straight A/perfect attendance kids.) I was shocked because my kids aren't perfect and they definitely act out, but absolutely not at a restaurant. In fact, we get complimented most times on how beautiful and well mannered our girls are when we are out. There were several moments when I looked at my Luciana and saw her wide eyed with her mouth open in horror. She was embarrassed for them. She was mortified at their behavior. She was waiting for their mouths to get slapped. Well, the slaps never came, so the horror commenced.
This experience helps me realize why people might be in awe at the size of our family. If my kids acted like that and treated me that way... I would've dropped them off at the fire station years ago. There is absolutely no way my children would dream of talking back to me like that. So why are my kids different? Do I beat them? Do I pull a Carrie and make them "sit in the closet and pray"? Do I shelter them and make believe this world is filled with candy and rainbows at every corner? Do I only allow them to watch Veggie Tales and read the Bible, keeping their dear minds in a bubble and away from secular media?
Ummm no. To all the above. I have smacked my kids on the bottom and even their mouths from time to time. It is a very rare occasion nowadays, cause they know I'm not bluffing. I will soap my child's mouth up quicker than they can get the entire cuss word out. (Which again, never happens... cause I WILL soap them!) I am honest with my girls. Answering any questions they have about sex, relationships, friends, marriage, or anything they might be wondering about in this crazy world. I never judge or condemn them, so they feel comfortable coming to me with these things versus going to their friends at school. I allow them to watch scary movies (ones that I know won't end them up sleeping in between Mike and I) and read novels. I draw the line at sexual content because I don't need to be feeding temptation to my girls when I am promoting abstinence. Basically, if there's sex in it, NO. So yes, my older girls watched The Skeleton Key and they have read Twilight. The good news is, their morals and values aren't shaken because they don't get them from the TV or a movie. They get them from my husband and I, making TV and movies what they are supposed to be- entertainment.
Our girls have chores and they will do what we ask with a "yes ma'am" or "yes sir". They will help by changing a diaper or giving the baby a bath. They will help take care of each other and they have no problem doing so. Our children are learning every day that this life isn't about me. It's not about serving me and doing whatever it takes and stepping on whoever I need to in order to get the best for me. Don't get me wrong. We encourage our girls to chase their dreams. We encourage our girls to take every advantage of this life and what it has to offer. But not at the cost of anyone else. Because of the servant minds we are instilling in our girls, their dreams are about others. About serving and helping and doing for others. So next time we talk about how many kids I have or that I have all girls, please don't look at me like I have terminal brain cancer and say "bless your heart". I love this life. I love my huge family. I love that I have been blessed with all girls. Give me 6 more just like these ones.
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